How to Shake Your Nerves When Negotiating

Last week I went to return a pair of pants. A sign at the store’s checkout counter read, “No refunds without receipt.” The stakes weren’t high. I could always donate. But I wanted a return. While standing in a long line, I felt like I was breaking the rules. My heart rate increased. Surprisingly,

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What is Your Negotiating Style?

Do you ever go to a meeting or social event and feel like you don’t fit in? I can feel that way when I’m around people who are more detail-oriented and technical in their thinking. Monthly I meet with a group of professional women called the “Diamonds” which is short for

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Be a Polite Disruptor – I Double Dog Dare You!

Excuse me. May I bother you for a quick question? Have you ever had someone ignore you or act like you are an inconvenience? Does that type of response shut you down? Or do you see that behavior as a challenge?  I chose to interpret someone’s dismissal as a “double dog

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What Are You Afraid to Ask For?

The most surprising result when doing the research for my new book, Ask Outrageously! The Secret to Getting What You Really Want, was the requests people won’t make.  In the short video below I discuss the #1 thing people are afraid to ask for in their personal lives. People would rather ask to borrow money than

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Are You Showing Up Powerfully?

Ever feel like you have two left feet especially when it comes to making a great first impression? I sure did the other day when I discovered I put the left shoe of two different shoes in my bag. What would you do? I thought of two possible options: present in the

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Are You Making Smart Asks?

If you traveled this summer then you probably saw impatient people. Last week my fellow travelers and I watched someone become aggravated and even rude to our flight attendants. He loudly complained his “frequent flyer status” hadn’t provided him with the seat he wanted. The airline employee replied, “Sir, when

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Why People Tell You “No”

Last week I asked someone at the store where the batteries were located. He smiled and said, “I don’t work here but I think they are in aisle 3.” Have you ever asked the wrong person for what you want? Probably. The #1 reason that people tell you “No” is that you

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How to Handle Being Told No

NO!  Have you ever stopped yourself from asking for something you wanted because you thought you would hear NO? Maybe you wanted to: ask for a promotion ask someone to go on a date ask for a discount ask for help on a project ask for more vacation time ask

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Do People Trust You? How to Have Wintegrity

Do people trust you? It depends. How honest are you? When I practiced law my advice to clients was, “Tell me the truth. No matter how bad the facts are, there is a strategy.” Most clients were honest and forthcoming. A few had selective memories. After one client was sworn

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What To Do When You Are At A Loss For Words

Have you ever lost your train of thought at a critical time? Last week I was interviewed on TV and found myself at a loss for words. At the beginning of the show, my mind wandered and it took me a few seconds to concentrate on what I was saying.

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How to Be a Great Boss – Not a Bully

Early in my career, a boss really intimidated me. He was so unpredictable and at times a bully. Each day, I would call his administrative assistant to ask about his daily mood. We had a code. I’d ask, “How’s the weather today?” and she’d say “It’s stormy,” or “It’s clear but

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