When Things Aren’t as Expected (How to Negotiate Change)
Have you ever faced a situation that was not at all what you first expected?
A few days ago I saw the newly translated version of my book Ask Outrageously! So exciting! However, when I examined the cover it looked different than what I anticipated.
Although I wrote the book and speak on the topic frequently, I couldn’t read the characters. Also, the art depicted wasn’t familiar. How does a dog eating a sausage relate to asking for more? (You can find two explanations at the end.)
Different languages and different ways of doing things can really throw you. We recently had that experience when traveling to Budapest and Prague. We couldn’t figure out what signs were telling us to do and when we asked others for help, we often didn’t understand the explanation.
Whether it is a new job, learning software or taking a vacation in a different country, you are experiencing change.
In my Passport to Success called Do Change Better that I wrote with Chris Clarke-Epstein, we discuss constructive ways to come to terms with the parts of a change you cannot control:
Let the “no control” factors go. Come to terms with what you cannot control – the “no control” factors. Recognize that they exist, see them for what they are worth and let them go. Organizations that spend energy on what they can’t control suffer low morale, energy drains and poor goal achievement.
Add to your knowledge base. Change usually means “new.” Give yourself permission not to know everything and work on filling in your knowledge gaps.
Find a “Partner in Change” i.e. someone going through a similar change. Look for someone with a positive attitude who keeps promises and has a sense of humor. And, who will be honest with you.
Acknowledge your attempts. Even if you fall on your face, stop and analyze your mistakes and review your plans.
Reward your success. Decide what a reward for your success might be – a party, a dinner, a trip? Whatever it is, make the reward meaningful to you and celebrate your success.
Don’t strive for perfection. Perfection is rarely obtainable and can be your enemy. Instead, strive for learning and progress.
A lack of knowledge can make you feel confused. However, the more you know, the less stress and fear you’ll experience.
Here’s the “rest of the book cover story”… When I asked my friends in China for help, they said one explanation is asking gets you the best result. (The dog on the front cover is being fed well i.e. sausage instead of the dog on the back chasing a chicken and only getting tail feathers.)
Another explanation is a tie to the Year of the Dog, which reflects success and prosperity. Love both of these!
Journey On and Ask Outrageously!
About Linda: A recognized authority on negotiations, workplace issues and strategic communication, Linda Swindling, JD, CSP is an author, media expert, a “recovering” employment attorney, and a professional speaker. Contact us to book Linda to speak at your event.